I wish my Dr. appointment was sooner... This is so hard waiting for an answer... I still feel a little pregnant which makes this all harder... I have so much flying through my head right now... All the what ifs... What if I am never able to have a baby??? What if there is something majorly wrong with me?? What if... I am scared that I will have to have that D&C... and scared that it might impact my fertility in the future... Maybe I have read too much on the internet, but I have found that they are linking too many D&C's to miscarriage... I don't know if I should believe it or not, but it scares me...

On an emotional level I am having a very difficult time, crying a lot...and my husband thinks he is being supportive...but really he is just annoying me...and I am scared that it will effect our marriage... He doesn't understand that sometimes I just need to grieve for the loss... Sometime I worry and I don't see anything wrong with that... We fight now more than ever... He keeps telling me that I am grumpy... I am depressed about this whole thing... I have never had to deal with something so difficult in my life. I just wish he would be more supportive. He works so many nights that he doesn't really have to, and I wish he would stay home and stay by my side... I wonder, do you think I am driving him to stay at work??????

I went up to what would have been the nursery in our new house, and lost it last night... I had planned everything out in there in my head...It's so hard to think about what would have been...